Do times feel tough in your relationship? Do you wish things felt as easy and exciting as they seemed when you and your spouse first got together?
I remember the great times I had with my wife when we were dating. We went fishing up Logan canyon. We took walks around the campus at Utah State. We listened to music we both loved. We went to baseball games. I remember many great times we had.
The common themes from these memories are:
- We had great times.
- The great times preceded the many pressures that face us today (such as jobs, kids, financial stresses, healthcare expenses, etc.).
When the times get tough it is easy to think that the good times are a thing of the past. When the many pressures of life, child-rearing, employment, finances, and relationship struggles add up, it can be difficult to remember the good times.
If you are feeling that you miss the good times you once had or things feel stale or disconnected, it may be time to find a way to get some of them back and to make new ones. Studies have shown that if you had great times in your relationship early on, you are more likely to be able to feel them later in your relationship. You need to make the time for them. Go out on dates, spend one-on-one time together each day, find things you can do together, and make some new great times. Remember how good it felt before? It can feel that way again. Make time for it. Make time for each other. Make the time necessary to feel great again.