Some of my fondest memories from my childhood are connected to various traditions we had. I remember having hot chocolate in our santa mugs with marshmallows on Christmas morning. I loved carefully searching the house for eggs on Easter morning. I looked forward watching fireworks on Independence day. On Valentines my parents would get me a large sugar cookie with my name on it. These and other family traditions stick with me because they remind me of those I love and the good times I have had with them.

I often ask couples in counseling what traditions they have. They often spout off traditions such as these I shared – all connected to their children. I often have to encourage couples to focus on making some traditions in their marriage relationship. Too often we are good parents, but, lose our marriage to parenting. However, I don’t think it needs to be an either-or thing. We can make family traditions bonding for marriages.

As a couple, you and your partner or spouse can make plans together that will be meaningful for the children. Spending this quality time together making such plans can strengthen your marriage. Don’t overdue it. Too many stress themselves out in an effort to make things perfect or keep up with someone in the neighborhood who looked more organized on Instagram. Rather, focus on how to make it meaningful to your marriage and your family. Work together with your spouse on the plans that you can create, share, and execute together. Then, watch together as your kids experience the magic you remember. You might realize that magic is even more meaningful to parents and couples than the magic you felt as a child.