My family and I moved this past weekend. As anyone who has moved knows, it was a long, tiring process! We began preparing to move a few weeks ago and I decided to do some decluttering before we began to pack up our things. Throughout that process, I looked at almost every item in our home and asked myself a couple of questions: how often do I use this, is it something worth packing in a box, putting in the moving truck and finding a place in our new home, or could I let go of it? As my pile of items to donate or trash grew larger, I began to feel lighter and happier. It also made it much easier when it came time to pack our belongings because we had less “stuff.” This process got me thinking about how couples might be holding onto clutter in their marriages. So here are a couple of questions to help you begin to declutter your marriage.
Am I holding on to things in the past that I don’t need anymore? Many times we hold onto past hurts or grievances and carry them around with us for a long time. Carrying them around becomes burdensome and is unnecessary. Take the steps needed to resolve the issue, like talking to your spouse about it, or choose to let go of it, putting it in the “donation” pile. If it’s too hard to let go of these things on your own, consider seeking the help of a marriage counselor.
Do I spend time and energy on the essentials in my marriage? Sometimes clutter consumes us and pushes the more important items out. Some of the essentials in your marriage should be: regular, dedicated, one-on-one time together, expressing love and appreciation more often than complaints and putting your marriage and your spouse before anyone or anything else. A lot of the other things in life tend to clutter our relationships, such as too much time spent on electronics or at work, or always focusing on what your partner is not doing well. This clutter will weigh your marriage down and keep you from the possible joy you could be feeling.
As I was sifting through my belongings this past week, there were times it was hard to get rid of some of my things. But, I decided to be firm with myself and really cut down on all the stuff. As I was carrying boxes back and forth, I was grateful I had chosen to declutter. If you make the decision to declutter your marriage, I know you will feel lighter emotionally and more satisfied with your marriage.
