Throughout our lives, most of us can recall hearing that we need to mind our manners. I know that I am continuously working with my children to remember to say please, thank you and you’re welcome. As adults, we know that it is important, kind and respectful to have good manners with those around us such as in the workplace, to strangers and with friends. What about in our marriages though? Are you remembering your manners when you are speaking with or doing something with your spouse?

It seems that at times, we become so accustomed to living with our significant other that we forget our please and thank you’s. We forget after so many years with the same person that we should hold doors open, we should ask nicely instead of expect or demand and we should let them know we are grateful when they do something for us and our family.

Instead of saying to your spouse something like “move your feet so I can see” which has more of a demanding tone, try asking nicely, “Could you please move your feet over so I can see the tv better?” I sometimes even add “I would really appreciate it”. Instead of telling them they need to take the trash out, ask politely. When your spouse does something for you remember to say thank you as you would to a stranger that opened the door for you. Having good manners in your relationship shows your partner that they mean something to you and that you respect them. Using good manners with your spouse will also be a good example for your children. They will see that not only should we have good manners with other people but in our marriages as well. We can show our children the ways that husbands and wives should treat each other.

Using good manners can sound so simple and silly to some, but it is one of the small things we can do in our relationships to make a big difference.